You have to be the right person and both of you have to be committed to make it work against all odds.
"The idea that there is one special person for me ruins a lot of marriages. A person falls head over heals with someone, gets married, and are happy for a while. But then something goes wrong, as it is almost bound to do, and there is a big fight. The next thing you know the person is wondering, "Did I make a mistake? Maybe I married the wrong person." He starts to look around and there is another person whom he likes really well -- and he doesn't fight with her! But that is because they aren't living together yet and haven't spent a lot of time together. So he divorces his first wife to marry another. Everything is blissful for a while, but eventually it happens again. And again. And again."
You have the privilege of picking the one with whom you wish to make a lifetime covenant. The field is wide with potential partners. So pick someone who shares things in common with you so that you can share life with her/him. But most importantly, find someone who is as dedicated as you are to making this relationship work, in good times and in bad times. If you are interested in someone, but she/he isn't putting much effort into keeping the relationship going, then you don't have someone worth marrying. If she isn't that interested now, what will she be like after marriage?
NB:
1. Avoid the plague of sin, marriage was not complicated in Eden until Adam and Eve sinned. Take any sin seriously and repent(turn away from it) rather than indulging in it secretly or otherwise
2. And Colossians 3: 16 Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. 17 And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.
3. Avoid the consumer mentality of shopping and or hoping from person to person like supermarkets having the best offer looking for what "benefits me", but rather give of what Jesus Christ has given to you.
4. Make it work: Apostle James said, "we all stumble in many ways", the redeemed can be helped by the Holy Spirit as they live out the Holy Covenant to God's glory
5. Work at showing the non believing world the mystery of Jesus' relationship with the church-his bride. Ephesians 5
6. Aim at hearing 'well done good and faithful servant" when we stand before God soon.
Do you get along with your siblings? Or how about your mom and dad? Do you love them? Or at least like them? But did you get to pick them? No? So how is it that you are able to get along with people you never got to choose for a partner? The fact is that you make it work.
And when the butterflies-Euphoria is gone after one year, do you have an authentic committed relationship with Jesus to take you through the life time? Character trumps chemistry. Not just in the public but even when alone with the audience of only God which is the most important.
"What we have come to believe to be right romantic "chemistry" is actually nothing more than "self-centered" love. Most people are romantically drawn to those who gratify them, so marry with expectations of being fulfilled by their mate. That type of love is not true selfless love, but is self-centered, basing its attraction on personal gratification. It says, "I love you for what you do for me. I am drawn to you for how you make me feel. I know I am in love with you, because I need you so much." Needing someone is not evidence of a selfless, giving love for them -- contrarily, it is evidence that you want them for the emotional fulfillment you will receive from them."
http://www.familyministries.com/marriage_purpose.htm
Calling - Every one is called and can serve God any where, are your spiritual gifts complementary and will you as a couple serve God better than individually to fulfil the God's purposes?
Career- Debatable!!- Is there a mutual agreement on what this means for the two of you and the implications thereof?
Proverbs 9: 9Give instruction to a wise man and he will be still wiser, Teach a righteous man and he will increase his learning. 10The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.
"The idea that there is one special person for me ruins a lot of marriages. A person falls head over heals with someone, gets married, and are happy for a while. But then something goes wrong, as it is almost bound to do, and there is a big fight. The next thing you know the person is wondering, "Did I make a mistake? Maybe I married the wrong person." He starts to look around and there is another person whom he likes really well -- and he doesn't fight with her! But that is because they aren't living together yet and haven't spent a lot of time together. So he divorces his first wife to marry another. Everything is blissful for a while, but eventually it happens again. And again. And again."
"And this is the second thing you do: You cover the altar of the LORD with tears, with weeping and crying; so He does not regard the offering anymore, nor receive it with goodwill from your hands. Yet you say, "For what reason?" Because the LORD has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant. But did He not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth. For the LORD God of Israel says that He hates divorce, "For it covers one's garment with violence," says the LORD of hosts. "Therefore take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously"" (Malachi 2:13-16).
You have the privilege of picking the one with whom you wish to make a lifetime covenant. The field is wide with potential partners. So pick someone who shares things in common with you so that you can share life with her/him. But most importantly, find someone who is as dedicated as you are to making this relationship work, in good times and in bad times. If you are interested in someone, but she/he isn't putting much effort into keeping the relationship going, then you don't have someone worth marrying. If she isn't that interested now, what will she be like after marriage?
NB:
1. Avoid the plague of sin, marriage was not complicated in Eden until Adam and Eve sinned. Take any sin seriously and repent(turn away from it) rather than indulging in it secretly or otherwise
2. And Colossians 3: 16 Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. 17 And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.
3. Avoid the consumer mentality of shopping and or hoping from person to person like supermarkets having the best offer looking for what "benefits me", but rather give of what Jesus Christ has given to you.
4. Make it work: Apostle James said, "we all stumble in many ways", the redeemed can be helped by the Holy Spirit as they live out the Holy Covenant to God's glory
5. Work at showing the non believing world the mystery of Jesus' relationship with the church-his bride. Ephesians 5
6. Aim at hearing 'well done good and faithful servant" when we stand before God soon.
Do you get along with your siblings? Or how about your mom and dad? Do you love them? Or at least like them? But did you get to pick them? No? So how is it that you are able to get along with people you never got to choose for a partner? The fact is that you make it work.
And when the butterflies-Euphoria is gone after one year, do you have an authentic committed relationship with Jesus to take you through the life time? Character trumps chemistry. Not just in the public but even when alone with the audience of only God which is the most important.
"What we have come to believe to be right romantic "chemistry" is actually nothing more than "self-centered" love. Most people are romantically drawn to those who gratify them, so marry with expectations of being fulfilled by their mate. That type of love is not true selfless love, but is self-centered, basing its attraction on personal gratification. It says, "I love you for what you do for me. I am drawn to you for how you make me feel. I know I am in love with you, because I need you so much." Needing someone is not evidence of a selfless, giving love for them -- contrarily, it is evidence that you want them for the emotional fulfillment you will receive from them."
http://www.familyministries.com/marriage_purpose.htm
Calling - Every one is called and can serve God any where, are your spiritual gifts complementary and will you as a couple serve God better than individually to fulfil the God's purposes?
Career- Debatable!!- Is there a mutual agreement on what this means for the two of you and the implications thereof?
Proverbs 9: 9Give instruction to a wise man and he will be still wiser, Teach a righteous man and he will increase his learning. 10The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.
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